What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
