Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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