I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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