it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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