Christians are straight up FREAKS
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
