therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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