i just had sex bonerless
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
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