Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
