I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
