Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
