Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
