i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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