he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
