What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
we're making bets on your personal life
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
