i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
