I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
