i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
mondays should just be called national damage control day
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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