btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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