we have pet lesbian snakes
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
