he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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