The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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