I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
