So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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