the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
