you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
