Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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