you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize