do herpes really smell.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
