You're completely useless in the revolution.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
