You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
