There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize
