Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
This is my gift to your gina
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I'm bleeding and have questions
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
