wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
