don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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