We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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