hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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