Christians are straight up FREAKS
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize