at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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