God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
