if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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