i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
