I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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