apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
