what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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