whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
