I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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