Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
