The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
