i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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