So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
